Do you have challenges controlling or coming to terms with feelings of anger?  Do you find that others are pushed away when you rant or blow off steam?  Dealing with anger can be a challenge if you don’t understand it.

Anger stems from fear and a sense of powerlessness.  It’s a response to the fear that some offense from the past will re-occur.  When you find yourself becoming angry, stop.  Remove yourself from the situation if you may do something that will only aggravate the situation.  Involve your conscious mind and investigate the fear that is triggering your anger.  Really be honest with yourself during this process.

Realize that although you may have this fear right now, it will pass, and that reacting with anger probably does not serve you.  You’re looking to move forward and to get to your goals.  Anger rarely improves the situation, so often times, the best thing to do is to cool down before re-entering the situation.  It may seem silly to withdraw for a few moments or to count to 10 before responding, and it works.  When you give yourself a chance to involve your mind instead of just allowing an emotional reaction, you reduce the chance that you’ll do something you’ll regret in the future.

Make a decision to change your emotion.  Think about the situation, and decide that it’s either interesting or humorous – or both.  By making the decision to see the challenge in a new light, you can effectively substitute the positive emotion for the anger.  This takes practice and the belief that you really can simply choose to feel something different.  Trust me though, you can.  I learned to do it, and so can you!

You really do have control over your feelings, and you can clearly control your actions.  Make the decision to have happy and healthy relationships, and to banish damaging, angry behavior.  Turn the tide of your emotions and move towards health every day!

You can do it!

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